Author: Carl Weber

Carl Weber, is the owner and founder of Carl Weber Consulting, a consulting group that helps businesses, non-profits, and individuals understand themselves, hire and manage well, and become great leaders. Carl worked in local government for more than ten years, as the Town Administrator of a few towns in NH. Once upon a time he was a search and rescue swimmer for the US Navy. Carl holds Bachelors’ Degrees in Political Science & Community Development and a Master’s Degree in Public Policy. Carl is a Certified Professional Behavioral Analyst (CPBA) and Certified Professional Motivators Analyst (CPMA). Carl regularly teaches on human factors and the relationship of behavior and leadership styles, as well as motivation, coaching, leadership challenges, and failing as a leader. His passion is to help leaders in their lifelong journey to finish well, to combat and work with their inner voice, and to live a meaningful story worth reading. Carl lives in Southern New Hampshire with his wife Amanda and together they are raising a small tribe of four young (somewhat crazy) women with the goal of unleashing them on the world to change it for the better.

Sung Heroes

Posted on by Carl Weber

It was a simple label on that bottle.

Just two words.

Unsung Heroes.

A spark of an idea.

Why do heroes go unsung?

Heroes make a difference.

Heroes make an impact.

Yet we do not sing.

Heroes reach out in our time of need.

Heroes care about us.

Yet we do not sing.

Heroes influence and change our world.

Heroes take the time to reach out.

Yet we do not…

Maybe we can change.

Maybe we can open our voices.

We can sing.

We can express gratitude and appreciation.

How about a new category: Sung Heroes.

Sung Heroes know the impact and influence in our lives.

Sung Heroes know how much we appreciate them.

Sung Heroes are encouraged to continue their journey as Heroes.

Here is my first attempt:

“Thank you for the time you spend. Thank you for the time you lend. You have been strong for me, unwavering like the branches of a strong tree. You have helped change the world for good, sometimes with something as simple as leaving me feeling understood. You are my sung hero. Yes, my sung hero.”

 

Strong, but Not Bitter

Posted on by Carl Weber

Strong, But Not Bitter

I like coffee. I like strong coffee.

I like strong coffee roasted in small batches by someone I know.

I like strong coffee served in a skull mug that was hand crafted in a wood-fired kiln by someone who I also know.

I like strong coffee with names like “demon roast” and “sinful delight.”

Coffee has become somewhat of a ritual for me. The morning starts and I love the sounds that our coffee maker makes.

Strange bubbly, dripping, awesomeness.

The house is filled with tempting dark aromas.

I wait for that “beep” that indicates that the lovely brew is ready to be consumed, and my day begins.

When describing this coffee ritual to a friend, they had a similar coffee ritual. We both savor the dark brew, but it came with a qualifier.

“I like coffee when it is strong, but not bitter.”

A pause in the conversation.

“Maybe that is a good way to think about our life’s journey. We become strong, because of the struggles, adversity, or obstacles, but it doesn’t make us bitter.”

Another pause.

The lesson sank in.

My coffee ritual has taken on new meaning. The process is the same. The same sounds come from the device. The same aromas fill our house.

But, as that first sip passes my lips, I remember those words.

Strong, but not Bitter.

What a great reminder and goal for our lives.

 

Go Live

Posted on by Carl Weber

While savoring both the conversation and the breakfast with a close friend, we discussed our lives as well as writing.

When, how, why, and what do we write?

How do ideas develop?

What makes something worth reading?

What do you do when ideas do not come?

How does that concept sit still for so long, then all at once it shouts at you to be put out into the universe?

I had a revelation and shared it with my friend.

“I realized recently that when I am getting writers block or feel stuck, it is the result of not really living life. Those times when I cannot seem to write are the exact moments when I am more closed off to others, not engaged, or distracted by the pressures of life.”

My friend’s advice?

Go Live.

Embracing Awkward

Posted on by Carl Weber

“Sure, I could call and follow-up on proposals, but calling that customer feels awkward.”

“Going to that event when I don’t know a lot of people is awkward.”

“Maybe we could be better friends, but talking about friendship with someone is awkward.”

“Talking to my kids about [insert almost any topic here] can be awkward.”

“I am a little insecure, and taking on this project, role, or job is awkward.”

When did awkward get a VETO? Who empowered awkward with the power to slow us down and even stop us?

Growth happens when we press forward with new experiences, skills, relationships, conversations, connections, and roles.

Maybe that awkward feeling can serve as a simple reminder that what we are about to do is important.

Instead of shying away from that feeling, maybe it is time for us to start embracing awkward and re-interpret those feelings.

Feeling awkward?

Yes.

Important work ahead?

Yes.

“Thank you awkward for the reminder of the importance of this next step.”

Awkward

 

The Hard Work of Dreams

Posted on by Carl Weber

IMG_3189

(Image courtesy of the One of My Dreams, and the road trip)

Sometimes our dreams don’t work out.

But dreams (goals, aspirations, how we want things to be) can fool us into thinking that the road will be easy.

We have this idea, so it should just happen right?

I want this or that, therefore it should become a reality.

Yes it may be a little work, but hey “I have been working on this dream for over two weeks.”

During a recent discussion with a close friend, we talked about how dreams are the result of hard work. The result (that dream state) is typically achieved after years of sacrifice and working a plan that made that dream a reality.

We laughed at how much we dream without counting the cost. Big dreams without counting the hard work it will take to make them happen.

The “overnight success” band dream. Fifteen years of crossing the country to work every small bar, festival, or venue.

The “retirement traveler” dream. Thirty-three years of saving, investing, and saying no to the daily temptations of purchases.

The “dream job” dream. Ten years of attending school part-time while working, raising kids, and unpaid internships to gain experience.

The “business start-up” dream. Thirteen years of finding a market, staying up late working on proposals, being rejected, making mistakes, borrowing money, trying to keep records, making a product or service, building relationships, inspiring trust, learning to ship, and trying to convince others that you bring value.

The “perfect parent” dream. A lifetime of relationships, negotiations, cleaning up, providing for, apologizing, correction and guidance, time, energy, and intention.

The “great relationship” dream. Seasons of distance, making time, grief, disappointment, non-response, frustration, misunderstanding, forgiveness, and rejection.

Dream away.

But know that dreams require something in return.

The hard work of dreams is what takes a concept or idea and makes it real.

It will cost you, but the reward is worth the hard work.

 

P.S. A few days ago marked four years for this writing dream. Just a few more decades to go…

Celebrate Events

Posted on by Carl Weber

Flags in DC

(Image Courtesy of My Daughter, and the Washington Monument)

A few years ago I wrote about lessons I learned from my mom.

They were simple lessons:

Be Tough. Work Hard. Celebrate Events.

Last week, I was able to share these lessons with the crowd of family and friends that gathered for her memorial service.

More than just the words, or the lessons. We decided to put one of her lessons into practice: Celebrate Events.

We decided to make this 3,138 mile journey memorable and celebrated events along the way.

Car Trouble.

Mountain views.

Hershey Park.

Fast Rides.

Park food.

Visits with great friends.

Sushi. (Arguably the best I have had.)

Long days in the car.

Audio books.

Car Dancing.

Hotel pools.

Traffic.

Food. Food. Food.

Hugs from those who are close.

Tears, memories, and more hugs.

Connection with those you love.

Ocean.

More driving.

Sea World.

Cousins!

More rides.

Florida rain.

A round of frozen drinks to toast the one we lost.

Driving still.

The meal at the Bull.

Washington D.C.

Gluten Free Grilled Cheese!!!

Memorials that move you.

Remembering great people and great events.

Walking. Walking. Walking.

Museum.

More road time.

TRAFFIC.

Family.

Driving still.

Home.

Despite the loss, despite the sadness, we celebrated.

Great new memories.

New stories.

Mom, we will miss you.

Thanks again for the lessons.