Who is your Edison?

homer_edison

I was reminded the other day how much we all compare ourselves to others. Despite our successes, there is always someone out there who seems to be ahead of us.

Image Courtesy of http://christineschallenge.blogspot.com/2011_02_01_archive.html

Their lead in life becomes a benchmark that we measure ourselves against. Homer Simpson suffered this comparison in a classic episode where he decides to become an inventor. He is plagued by how much more successful Thomas Edison was at his age, and keeps the poster on the wall to measure his own success.

I find myself doing the same thing, especially with a few successful people around me. While connecting with a few of them, I listened to them talk about their Edison. The person who they are comparing themselves to and coming up short. Those people who I was comparing myself to, were busy comparing themselves to others.

I couldn’t help myself…and blurted out:

“Oh, they are your You!”

After an awkward laugh, I began to realize how unfortunately universal this comparison has become. Homer became so upset with comparing himself to Edison, that he drove to the museum to destroy Edison’s work. When he got there, he discovered another poster similar to his own. It was Edison’s poster comparing himself to Leonardo da Vinci.  Even Edison had an Edison.

Who is your Edison? Maybe today is a good time to realize that you are not Edison. You are you, and that is good enough.

I am on YOUR Team!

Your TeamImagine how much simpler life would be if those around you had to wear team shirts. All of us have people who are on our team. All of us have people who are not on our team.

Sometimes we confuse the two, especially during a conflict. Shirts could make it easier to keep track, and not confuse our interactions between these two distinct set of people in our lives.

When we are interacting with people who are not on our team, we have to play defense to protect ourselves.  We also play offense to get ahead or gain the upper hand. Both are designed to “win” against the other person. Over time, our playbook is filled with these strategies.

Unfortunately, our playbook can become our default method for all of our interactions, even our interactions with people close to us…with people who are actually on our team. The team shirt could serve as a reminder.

“Look at my shirt! I am on YOUR Team!”

I need this reminder. It helps me to switch gears and let go of my strategies. When I remember who is on my team, I remember they are here to help.

The “Know Yourself” Message

Know Yourself. Change the WorldOne of my first posts involved explaining the tagline for what this little adventure is all about. The “Know Yourself. Change the World.” post was almost a year and a half ago. I began to reflect on those simple words, and wondered if this message is still valid. Wondering if this message still resonates.

Imagine my surprise when I opened up a Christmas present from my oldest daughters. It was a coffee mug that they had customized for me. Right there on the mug was the tagline, the message. They both read my posts (when they are not studying hard while away at college…hint, hint). The message resonated enough for them to include it in my Christmas gift.

Sometimes a simple confirmation is all that we need. Someone to recognize the efforts we are putting forward. This gift is more than just a vessel for my coffee. This gift is a daily reminder that the message resonates and to keep trying to change the world by helping others know themselves.

What is your message? Where can you help encourage someone else’s message?

As for what is on the other side of the mug, well that is a story for another day.

The Successful Solution Trap

The Successful Solution

Success is great. The trouble with success is that over time, you begin to rely on that success the next time. And the next time, and the next. The prior solution may have been great, and after a few successes, you may even have a few various solutions up your sleeve. Maybe you even have five. But these are a pretty solid five solutions that have worked in the past. You rely on them, and they solved a lot of issues.

But what about when there is a need that doesn’t match your five?  How many times is someone describing their issue, their problem, their need and you are just trying to figure out how to make it fit into one of your solutions?

This success solution trap became real to me a few weeks ago.  I took a call.  I listened for a few minutes.  I had a plan.

“This should solve your issue, and I will send over an outline.”

I opened up an old document that was a successful solution in the past, made a few changes and sent it over.  The reply was not what I was expecting.

“What is this? How is this going to solve our issue?”

I stepped back and replayed the call in my mind while looking at my notes. I was so worried about fitting their issue into my solution, I even ignored my own notes. Shortly after, I re-drafted a new solution and sent it over. It was the right fit, and much more creative than my old canned solution.

It takes a little more work, but new creativity beats old successful solutions. I want to learn from the past successful solutions, but not become a slave to them.

Sitcom Rules for Our Lives

Now and then (okay, way too often) I misread someone’s humor and become angry.  If you remember, it is my primary emotion.  During one of these moments, someone mentioned how much easier life would be if we were in a sitcom, instead of real life.

They explained the following rules that would help all of us.

1.  There is a laugh track in the background so you know when someone is joking, or attempting humor.

2.  The show only lasts 30 minutes so all arguments or fights can only last until the credits role.

Genius.  How do we put these two into action?  

Important Tip:  We have to agree to these two rules with people around us before the next conflict starts.  Don’t wait until the argument starts to try these out.

Applying Rule #1:  When you are attempting to be funny, and it seems to cause a rise in someone else, just laugh out loud in one of those annoying laugh track sort of ways. Maybe even add some clapping for yourself.

“Ha, Ha, Ha….Bhaaaaaaahaaaaaaahaaaa!”

Applying Rule #2:  When the next argument starts, look at your watch.  Know that the credits will role in 30 minutes, and you have time for commercial and bathroom breaks. Talk it out, but set this boundary so that you are working towards the solution within defined limits.

Try it out, and feel free to use Rule #1 to help you not take things so seriously before moving to Rule #2.

100 Blog Posts…100 Lessons

This is it, my 100th Blog Entry.  A friend suggested that I write about what I learned over the past year (and a few months) when I reach this milestone.  These are the lessons I learned along the way.

1.  Some days blogging is hard.

2.  Some days blogging is easy.

3.  Writing is much different from presenting or speaking.

4.  Writer’s block stinks.

5.  Writing takes discipline.

6.  Discipline is not my favorite thing.

7.  Blogging connects you to the world.

8.  Blogs encourage other people to write.

9.  Keep reading and learning.

10.  Kids provide a lot of material.

11.  Work provides a lot of material.

12.  Life provides a lot of material.

13.  Be open about your own failures.

14.  Write about when you fail.

15.  Write about when you succeed.

16.  Remember that not everyone in the world reads your blog.

17.  Remember that not everyone in your own circles reads your blog.

18.  Try to write at least once a week.

19.  Don’t beat yourself up when you don’t write.

20.  Your followers are important.

21.  The number of followers is not important.

22.  Be vulnerable.

23.  Read other people’s blogs.

24.  When you have an idea for a blog, write it down, or make a voice recording in your phone.  If you don’t, you will forget.

25.  Find a time and place to write that doesn’t distract you.

26.  Find a great editor.

27.  My wife is a great editor.

28.  Don’t expect your editor to edit at the last-minute just because you want to get your blog posted.

29.  The titles of your blogs matter.

30.  Don’t be obsessed with checking the stats counter.

31.  Some people find your blog by accident.

32.  Some people try hard to become a blog entry.

33.  Some people are horrified at the thought of becoming a blog entry.

34.  First, do no harm.

35.  Your stories are your perspective, not absolute truth.

36.  Think.

37.  Think before you write.

38.  Read your posts before you hit the publish button.

39.  Save often.

40.  Don’t be snarky.

41.  The posts you wrestle with the most, resonate with most.

42.  Write about what you need to change in yourself.

43.  Sarcasm is not your friend.

44.  Humor works, but not at the expense of others.

45.  Suggest, don’t direct.

46.  If you get a ton of hits in one day, it is because they are looking for something or someone else.

47.  Take the risk.

48.  Be yourself.

49.  Respond to comments.

50.  This is halfway through the list of 100 Lessons.

51.  Don’t be frustrated when it doesn’t save, the next draft will be even better.

52.  Don’t place limits on yourself.

53.  Use spell check.

54.  Observe life.

55.  Follow through is important.

56.  Don’t be afraid.

57.  When you re-post something, like a Ted.com talk, some people consider that cheating.

58.  When all else fails, re-post something.

59.  When you are stuck, try a survey.

60.  Try to leave this world a better place.

61.  You are creative.

62.  Be creative.

63.  Share your gifts.

64.  Your Narrator will fight against you when you write.

65.  It is fun/scary when your kids read your blog.

66.  It is fun/scary when your parents read your blog.

67.  Helping just one person on their journey is worth it.

68.  Don’t rant.

69.  Only make a list of 100 things once (it is harder than you thought).

70.  Be humble.

71.  Set yearly goals.

72.  Be accountable.

73.  Connect with other people in real life.

74.  Don’t be upset that your most popular post was not about you.

75.  Listen to other people’s story.

76.  Sometimes great story’s will find you.

77.  Be the hero in someone’s story.

78.  Fame and importance are not the same thing.

79.  Be important.

80.  Try to be better in your actual life.

81.  Be thankful.

82.  Dream big.

83.  Brace for failure.

84.  Get back up.

85.  Remind yourself that you are okay.

86.  Remain teachable.

87.  Coffee helps…but not too much.

88.  Bounce ideas off others.

89.  Don’t take criticism too personally.

90.  Find your voice.

91.  Help others.

92.  Tell your story.

93.  Try.

94.  Try again.

95.  You will get better the more you write.

96.  You will make an impact.

97.  You cannot make an impact by keeping your thoughts inside.

98.  Don’t give up.

99.  Know yourself.

100.  Keep trying to Change the World!