Sincere Appreciation

Image by Oberholster Venita from Pixabay 

People do things well. We want them to know.

People do things well. They want to know.

We want to express appreciation. We want it to be sincere.

They want to be appreciated. They want it to be sincere.

We have barriers to showing appreciation. Fear, Ego, weird “great, great, great, great, great” patterns.

They have barriers to receiving appreciation. Fear, Ego, and that damn Narrator.

How do we show sincere appreciation? How do we satisfy the need?

Try these three simple steps.

  1. Tell them what they did.
  2. Explain the positive impact it had.
  3. Express appreciation.

What does this sound like?

“Mary, I wanted to let you know that the report you created for that customer was very helpful. They were confused, and you brought clarity. They went from hesitant to signing with us. Thank you for your hard work, your ability to simplify issues for the customers is very helpful, I am so glad you are here on the team.”

“Bill, I noticed last night that after the long day at work you spent time with the kids helping with their homework. Your patience and ability to explain the homework in more concrete terms helped them “get it.” Thank you for the sacrifice and for giving them the gift of your time, especially when you are tired.”

Jessica, thank you for taking out the trash as well as the recycling. Since your sister has been away at school, you have had to take on a few more responsibilities around the house. Your taking initiative to pick up these chores has helped us all with the new workload around the house. Thank you for pitching in and helping, it makes a real difference. Want to go get some ice cream?

Sincere appreciation helps them know they are seen.

Sincere appreciation helps them know their work makes a difference.

Three simple steps. Now we just need to act.

Try it out and let us all know how it goes.

And to help lead the way, I am going first.

Dear Readers of this work. You read, view, comment, share, and like this blog and have been doing so for years. Your participation has made me feel like I not only have a voice in this space, but can make a difference in the lives of others. Thank you so much for reading this, especially with all the choices you have out there. Your words of encouragement or even a “like” helps me break through my own narration that I shouldn’t keep doing this. Thank you for being here.

Want to go get some ice cream?

Thank You

The phone rang.

It was a long-standing client.

I was quick to answer the call. I assumed they needed something right away.

They only said two words.

“Thank you.”

I was not sure how to respond besides “you’re welcome” so I also asked if they needed anything.

Nope. We just wanted to say “thank you” for our call a few weeks ago. We were a little stuck and needed some direction and talking it through really helped. We also realized that we typically call when we need something but don’t really ever call afterwards, but it seemed important to say “thank you.”

After that call I felt more inspired. More energized.

They didn’t have to make that call, but they did. They didn’t have to say “thank you”, but they did. And it made an impact. My work felt more meaningful, more important.

Where can we make those calls, and use those words? Who is helping, guiding, or assisting us in our journey? Who needs to hear from us?

Try it out today, make at least one call. Be grateful, say “thank you” and imagine the impact we can make.

20,000 Views: 20,000 Thanks

20,000 visits

Today is a milestone: 20,000 views on the blog. I am blown away by this whole blogging phenomenon and how each of us can spread ideas across the globe. Blogging made me think about the printing press and how when it was introduced it created fear because it would mean anyone could print their ideas…unedited and uncontrolled. Those same detractors would never have been able to fathom the ability to spread an idea across the globe in a single click.

This milestone could not have happened without YOU! I am humbled and honored to be in this space and have people who connect with this attempt to Change the World.

Thank you to my wife and editor who puts up with my anxious “did you read/proof it yet” seconds after I send her the draft.

Thank you to my daughters who provide inspiration and material and generally put up with me. Together we have conquered fear, hikes, our first race, and you provide things to hold in my pocket when I am away.

Thank you to friends who provided ideas, thoughts, and even artwork for this blog.

Thank you to my Mom and the Navy for helping to shape and mold me.

Thank you to Talin Orfali, a Canadian writer who followed and encouraged me early on.

Thank you to the people from over 139 countries who recently visited. Most of you were looking for something else, but it is flattering.

Thank you for everyone who was looking for a trophy cup image or sporting cup event, but found the cup post by accident. (Search “Trophy Cup” on Google Images)

Most of all Thank YOU for reading, encouraging, and helping me develop some thoughts around helping to Change the World.

Who knows, it just may work.

Thanks for the Pool…

Thanks for the PoolThis week was Hot!

At one point the little temperature gauge in my car read 103 degrees.  At the height of the heat I got a quick text from my wife.  It read,

“The pool is so awesome.  Thank you so much for getting it and putting it up.”

The day came to a close and as I walked out to my car after a long day at work.  I walked beside another person and mentioned that I got a thank you from my spouse about setting up the pool.  What I heard back caught me a little off guard.

“I sent a thank you to my spouse as well for putting the air conditioners in the windows…and they are still sitting in the basement and not installed.”

I felt the need to clarify.

“No, it was a real thank you because they appreciate the pool on such a hot day.  It was not a sarcastic thank you.”

The person looked confused and only replied with a puzzled, “oh” and got in their car and drove off.  I thought to myself, “Wow, this person thought my spouse was being critical of me and was joining in about their spouse.”

This reminded me of how often I hear other people criticizing their spouses or significant others, their friends, and even this kids in front of others.  I grew up around a lot of people who would do this, and it has taken a lot of effort to not follow in that path.

Why do we feel so compelled to express such dissatisfaction with others?  What makes matters worse is how often I hear it happen in front of the person being criticized.

“He is just not that handy around the house, and we have to pay a lot to get simple things done around our house.”

“She is not great at managing the day-to-day, so I have to step in a lot.”

“They are not that sharp, and I don’t know how they are going to make it after highschool.”

I am heading to a party with a lot of couples and their kids this afternoon, and I am going to count how many times I hear this happening (maybe it could someday be a kind of a sad bingo game for parties).  For the next week or so, take the time to listen for it, you may be amazed at how often this occurs.  When you hear it happening, have the courage to step in and provide an encouraging word or re-direct the conversation.    And if you catch yourself doing it…Stop it.