A Little Friendly Research Part 4

Part 4. Go ahead and catch up on Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, or what got it all started.

(It is okay, we will wait.)

In order to learn more about friends and friendships, I asked some of the followers of this blog and the answers appear below.

Question 4: How much time in a given week do you think about friendships?

Probably an hour at the least and a few hours at the most a day, but probably every day.

It ebbs and flows….when life is busy, not as much, but I am okay with that because I feel safe knowing that they aren’t intentionally forgetting me and vice versa.

Depends on the week/work/kids etc. probably 3 hours if you count weekly coffee catch-ups.

I think about friendships less often, but they come to mind typically when there’s a special event approaching like a birthday, anniversary… or this survey.

Well, if you could see inside my brain…

I think about my friends many times throughout the week.

A lot, and I’ll leave it at that. Probably because that’s sort of a sore spot for me right now.

As a single person, they are my family. I pray for them as they are at their jobs, with their family etc.

In tougher times, when they might be going through a difficult period, and vice versa I invest more time and thought.

Would always like it to be more.

This week, thanks to this survey, a lot. In the typical week, very little.

I think about friends a lot. Daily, maybe hourly.

And I try to find ways to pass along a cheer or a love note or something to remind them they have someone who is FOR them.

Almost every day.

On to Question 5. Question 9 will be here before we know it.

Let’s press on together.

I promise, it is worth it.

 

 

 

 

A Little Friendly Research Part 3

Part 3 of a series on friends and friendship. You can read part1, part 2 or the inspiration to ask them first, or jump right in.

In order to learn more about friends and friendships, I asked some of the followers of this blog and the answers appear below.

Question 3: What do you expect from a friend?

Honesty, understanding, trust, that they have your back.

See questions 1 and 2.

Fun, support, honesty in their advice and honesty when it comes to our relationship (if the other person is upset with me they will say it or if they need me to make more of an effort).

Basically what I outlined in question 1, with the understanding that they won’t always meet these “goals” and that they’ll *&#$ up sometimes (and I will too) because we’re human and not capable of perfect relationships. But you’ve gotta try … more often than not, you’ve gotta be trying if I’m trying.

I also expect that if I am failing as a friend, they will tell me.

See question #1.

(Author’s Note, ok, ok, I get it, question 3 was a similar question!)

I think one of the things that I expect the most is that my friends are FOR me, even when I am not around. I can trust that they think of me occasionally, pray for me, don’t talk negatively to others about me and pay attention to the things that make me smile.

Love and respect.

Truth. Truth in love. But truth.

I try to not have expectations of my friends, because I don’t think its fair to. I’d like to think that I’ve chosen wisely and surrounded myself with people that would make the choice to step up when they can – and haven’t felt alone or disappointed yet.

My love language is time and words of affirmation. So those are things that will most easily reach my heart.

On to question 4. The journey continues.

 

Go Ask Them

Go Ask Them (1)

Friendship has been on my mind lately.

How do friendships work? What makes the best friends? Am I a good friend? What do we need most from friends?

In the past I offered advice for bad friends, but what about the good ones? How do you cultivate solid friends in life?

The other day while discussing friendship with my Bride, I got some solid advice.

“So, friendships and what makes the best ones have been swirling around in my head.”

“Are you going to write about friendship?”

“I think so, but I am not sure where to get the best information to write about friends.”

“Why don’t you Go Ask Them?”

Great advice.

And Go Ask Them is what I did.

The next few posts will summarize the results.

But.

Just as my finger was about to hit the POST button this morning, it dawned on me how that advice was universally brilliant.

Wondering how to better connect with your employees?

Go Ask Them.

Wondering what new offerings would best serve your customers?

Go Ask Them.

Wondering how to be a better spouse or partner?

Go Ask Them.

Wondering how to be a better parent to your kids?

Go Ask Them.

Wondering what role would best help your aging parents?

Go Ask Them.

Sometimes we just assume we know best. We have an idea and run with it. We are trying to help.

We don’t always meet the mark.

Next time, follow the advice.

Go Ask Them.