Category: Random Thoughts

You’re Awesome…

Posted on by Carl Weber

There is nothing better than working with people.  I mean it.  Either in a team, or individually it makes for fun stories (and I have permission to share this one).

A large aspect of what I do is helping people understand themselves in a behavioral sense. One measure is how much a person interacts with or the influence they have over people. Someone who scores high by this measure tends to be optimistic, interactive (loud) and can move the crowd.  A lower score is somewhat pessimistic, introverted (quite) and withdrawn.  Neither is right or wrong, they are just different and interesting.

While working with a couple, one of them measured extremely high and the one was extremely low.  It was almost impossible for them to be any more different in this category.  They say “opposites attract” and I have seen this play out in behaviors with couples.  It is magnetic and exciting while dating, but after a few years…well you know.

This particular difference plays out when delivering or receiving compliments.  (One of the hardest aspect of leading, either in your work or life…but that is for another day.)  And this is how it played out.

The Optimist (high score):  “You’re Awesome!!!”

The Pessimist (low score):  “What?”

The Optimist (high score):  “You’re Awesome!!!”

The Pessimist (low score):  “Let me get this straight.  So far this morning you said the coffee was awesome, the dog was awesome, and I am awesome.  What does that even mean?”

The Optimist (high score):  “You’re Awesome!!!”

The Pessimist (low score):  “So in your world, I am somewhere between coffee and dog.”

Optimism can be a great thing.  Inspiring others, acknowledging who they are and what they contribute is a great attribute, but taken to the extreme can be seen as superficial and meaningless.  Everything cannot be awesome, or the word losing its meaning.  

If you are optimistic, don’t stop…the world needs some hope these days.  You may need to be a little more careful with the words you choose.  Sincerity is the key.  If you are on the other spectrum, remember that you see the world in a more grounded way, to you the coffee is adequate or okay.  But when you get that great cup of coffee…tell someone (don’t just point out how it could have been better).

For the next week, let’s try a little experiment.  Listen to yourself and 3 people who are in your circle, your life.  Determine where they fall in the optimism/pessimism continuum and let’s try to meet them there.  For the optimists a pat on the back and a “nice job” will go a long way.  For the others, being sincere and providing details will take the “nice job” from empty words to real meaning.  We can all use a little encouragement, and why not apply it this week.  Let me know how it turns out.

18 (actually 23) Minutes

Posted on by Carl Weber

Recently while talking to a friend about work/life balance and trying to make small changes in our lives, we talked about writing.  I asked how the writing was going and this friend described the traditional process.

“In the past, I would typically write every few months or so, and attempt to write a novel in a weekend.”

“How did that work out?”

“It was crap.”

As we talked, I thought about how most of my life mirrors this process.  Life is busy. There are things I would like to do, they build up, and then I try to do it all in a weekend.

The result: crap.

My friend described a new process.  Write each day for 5 minutes.  Don’t try to write a novel.  Just write.  If you skip a day, the next day is not 10 minutes, each day the clock resets: just 5 minutes.  This small decision each day is not overwhelming, but begins to create a regular outlet.  A pattern.  A new way of living.

I began to think about how simple yet effective this approach can be, especially when trying to manage our busy lives.  Do you need to spend more time with someone, spend time quietly reflecting, or [insert your particular thing here]?  Why not start with 5 minutes a day.

Recently I got an update.

“I am up to 18 minutes a day.  Some days I skip, but now I look forward to writing.”

“How is the writing going?

“Still mostly crap, but sometimes there is some good stuff in there.”

The result: only mostly crap, with some good stuff.  Now that is progress!  When we talked the other week, the 18 minutes has grown to 23 minutes.  You could start today, take your 5 minutes and do something you have been meaning to do.  Tomorrow try it again, and the next day, and the next day.  You may just find some good stuff in there.

P.S.  It was this friend and this process that got me to stop dreaming about it and actually write this blog.  Thanks.

The Lost Generation?

Posted on by Carl Weber

I recently had the privilege of hearing Rebecca Ryan speak at a conference.  She started her talk with this video and it gave me hope, and I had to share it.  You can check out her work at her website.

http://www.nextgenerationconsulting.com

Rebecca if you ever read this, Thank You for making such an impact in our lives, and our communities.

Kids These Days…

Posted on by Carl Weber

How funny is it that once you reach 40, you start to become Snarky about the generations below you?  Regularly when speaking to larger groups of supervisors or managers, you start to hear this:

“THEY do not have OUR work ethic.”

“THEY don’t take the jobs as seriously as WE do.”

“There is no way that THEY could do OUR jobs.”

Why do we have to hold ourselves up as that standard to measure everything else against?  I recently heard someone say “don’t you realize that this next generation will be the first generation not to surpass the previous one in wealth?”

Well, everything fails by an irrelevant standard…

Judgement between generations is not new, but I wonder if some of the angst stems from our own insecurities, or jealousy of a generation that may be more balanced between work and life.  Remember, some generations witness first hand how companies treated their parents during recessions, should we be surprised that after witnessing someone being treated poorly by a company, a child, coworker, or friend may not hold WORK in the same regard as a prior generation?

P.S. The generation ahead of you said the same things about you, and somehow the world survived.

Your Job Matters

Posted on by Carl Weber

I was working with a team in a laundry facility at a nursing home.  They were in conflict, working long hours in a small and hot space.  During the individual interview with each employee, I asked a simple question and expected a simple answer: What do you do?  You, like I may have expected answers such as, “I clean laundry” “I wash soiled sheets”, but that was not the reply.

Every employee had a similar response.  “We provide dignity to our residents in their last stages of life.”  Completely blown away, I didn’t know how to reply, so I pressed further.  “What do you mean?”

“Clean sheets each day are dignity, and another thing, we wash their personal clothes, and mend their sweaters…something that may be the last connection to their former life…that is what we do.”

Do you think someone told them that their job mattered?  Absolutely.  Why don’t we do this enough with positions that seem “less than” when compared against more prestigious jobs?  You can start today…what are you waiting for?  If you are in one of those jobs that makes life better for others, hear this:  Thank You…Your Job Matters.